Introduction – Being Spiritually Uncomfortable.
As a convert now 21 years in the church, my upbringing was
quite different. While I was born into a Christian family, we didn’t adopt all
the cultural habits of the church. There was a family that took us into their fold
and made sure everything was going well for us. It was good until this family
got pushy, would show up to our house looking for us. There was a falling out
with them after some other things occurred. The result was my family resented
them, especially after no legitimate reason they failed me in early morning seminary;
even with missing only a few times and following the assignments. I didn’t
equate them with a good culture, and sort of was put off by anyone embodying
those traits.
Fast forward, I’m 21 years old smack in the middle of my
mission from 2010-2012. Most of my mission I served rural areas, but this
assignment I was lucky to be in the big city. The Elders Quorum President was
in his younger 30’s, he had a beautiful wife, and a handful of various kids;
ranging infant to 8 years old. On Sunday he very charismatically approached us
missionaries. He wanted us to come over to his house and share a gospel message
for his family home evening. He of course mentioned we would be in and out less
than 30 minutes; meeting current mission standards being inside established
member homes without teaching an investigator.
Roses, Crayons, Cliché Word-Wall Art
We finally get over to his house which was in a decent neighborhood
relatively speaking. On entering the home, it was a strange combination of
looking immaculate but with a random child’s toy here and there. One the wall
in very large script was a saying, I don’t recall the exact words; but that doesn’t
matter in this story. I recall another strong impression about this family, in
their living room there was no television. The focus of the living room was
being with family or hosting guest(s); as I could hear a television sounds
coming from a room without a door down a hall.
Note. Retrieved from
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We shared our message according to the family home evening
lesson plan he asked us to talk on. We introduced ourselves, discussed how the proselyting
efforts were going, etc., while this happened, I felt so uncomfortable sitting
in their home. In my mind I thought something like, “Wow, they are the Stepford
family,” or, “This family has no other characteristic then a gospel centered
family,” and “Why do I feel like I’m in a temple?” The few photos that scattered
this minimalist-modern decor home were the couple at their temple marriage, of
their children in family photos, or again more pictures of various temples.
Being Spiritually Uncomfortable.
I don’t excuse my thought I had then, and apparently, they
were strikingly pronounced in my memory. I felt physically, and little
spiritually uncomfortable in their home. Due to my experiences I mocked them mentally
as I thought of them as this fake family; with no other traits then being
members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Its funny here I am
in the middle of my mission, I was seasoned missionary at that point. A daily
basis of my life was practically was eat, sleep, pray, and proselyte. Why would
I feel physically uncomfortable or spiritually uncomfortable for that matter?
This wasn’t the only time that this happened for the rest of
my mission I would encounter these families like this. Again, same feelings and
thoughts in each of their homes. There was not a sign of filth, or obvious sin,
these families were living a covenant life the best they could give based off
their individual capacities. That elder’s quorum president I mentioned
previously was very active he knew who was in his quorum; including the
inactive or those hanging on waiting to be removed from church records. He had
a decent paying job, loved his wife, and had a beautiful family. I asked myself
then, and several other occasions since why I felt this way.
Spiritual Arson
If you have been on Twitter for any second looking at any
church post, you will likely have come across comments about the podcast
Spiritual Arson; which I highly recommend listening to. Adam and Tanner are the
host of this podcast. I don’t recall which episode started it, but I started to
think about that time on my mission of being spiritually or physically uncomfortable.
Recently a thought came to mind, “Hey dumb-dumb why don’t we pray about this?”
Is what lead to me finally after all these years having an understanding. I’m
very certain that the understanding I have is from the Lord, as it came through
familiar means in which I recognize the spirit; voice of the Lord, and member
of the god head.
Why I was uncomfortable, wasn’t that I wasn’t worthy as
missionary, rather the opposite in fact. What I didn’t recognize is I was
seeing righteous saints and seeing a type of life modeled before me that I
should have for myself. The part of me that was uncomfortable was the natural
man. The very basic monkey minded brain that is at odds against our very
creator; due to the fallen nature of this telestial word (see Mosiah 16:5; Alma
41:11; Alma 42: 7-24; D&C 20:20). I wish I had known then what I know now.
I was feeling the natural man being put off by righteousness.
Establishing Righteous, Christlike Homes.
Elder Maynes (2011) spoke on this very subject, which I
would recommend as its great talk, ironically it was during the same year on
this mission, and he recommended some very simple things to build your home on
a firm foundation (para. 2). In reading this talk again some things stood out to
me, such as that we need to grasp the eternal family (understanding the plan of
salvation), sacredness of the family (man and woman equal in marriage bringing
children into the covenant; birthed or adopted), and the “unprecedented attack
on the institution of the family” (Maynes, 2011). We will then have a desire to
build up a righteous home and live the best we can in alignment to the gospel
and covenants we made.
Well what if you’re new, or recently back in the fold? Well “We
[start] by following the counsel of our church leaders…and [hold] weekly family
home evenings as well as daily prayer and scripture study” (Maynes, 2011, para.
13). We have amazing resources available to us, such as the inspired Come
Follow Me series; that’s been so crucial during this year. These can be melded
into daily studies as well great family home evening lessons. If you need to
start somewhere those are wonderful places to begin.
In Closing
Retrospect is a terrible thing sometimes, but a great
motivator to do good now. I wonder that If I had prayed about those feelings,
that happened almost a decade ago, what my life would be like now? While I’m
inclined to punish my mistakes, I know that through the power of the atonement
of the Savior Jesus Christ that I can be cleansed. I wish to be feeling the Great
Refiners Fire every single day for the rest of my life. As I strive to follow
the teaching of Jesus Christ and look to the revealed word through Christ’s
chosen prophet and apostles, I know that I can live the covenant life, and
perchance by the grace of God be exalted with my wife, our children, and our
families.
Comments
Have you experienced the natural man responding to
righteousness? If you have, please feel welcomed in sharing this experience.
References
Maynes, R. J. (2011, April). Establishing a Christ-centered
home. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2011/04/establishing-a-christ-centered-home?lang=eng
Simple Stencil
(n.d.) The best things in life | Wall quote decal | Inspirational home décor
wall art | Removable vinyl art. Pintrest. https://www.pinterest.com/pin/80150068359534825/
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